Thursday, August 20, 2009

62 is as Big as Love Can Get

While grieving Webster's passing I couldn't help but wonder "How on earth could this little guy have made such a huge impact on us in such a short amount of time?", when I figured out exactly how long our precious journey had been I immediately knew... I looked at the timestamp on the first photo of Webster looking out at us, 2:29pm on Sunday the 16th of August, 2009; then I estimated when it was that he died, somewhere around 4:30am on Wednesday -- let's see that's just a little over 2 1/2 days... 48 hours, plus 12 hours, plus 2 hours... 62 hours!!! Absolutely incredible! I couldn't believe it, I double and triple checked, even used the calculator for a final check; yes, 62 hours is absolutely correct. I have to tell you another story from almost 7 years ago in order to help you understand the significance and meaning to us of the number 62.

In November of 2002, while visiting our grand-daughter, Dylan, who was 4 at the time, some bantering ensued between her and Stephie as to who loved the other the most... Dylan says "I love you", Stephie says "I love you more", Dylan responds "I love you 4", Stephie "I love you 8", I jumped in with "I love you 10", this went back and forth between the 3 of us... 15, 20, 25, 40, 50... then Dylan responds emphatically, and with total confidence that this game is now over and she is the winner, "I love you 62!". That was it, this was the final answer, this was as big as love gets. Ever since that day, we tell each other (and Dylan) all the time that we love each other 62.

So, you see, 62 is as big as love can get and that is the precise number of hours this precious little dog with the big heart was allowed to be in our lives. He loved us and we loved him 62!

Sometimes it's not about the healing but about the helping

As we've been sharing with friends, we're feeling much better today .... strange, but lessons are falling into place and that brings a sense of peace to us. We were where we were supposed to be for a specific reason - sometimes it's not about the healing but about the helping. Many more lessons here, but this one is primary.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Heartfelt thanks to Riverview Animal Hospital

Thank you so much to all of you at Riverview Animal Hospital for your care, support and help with little Webster. We so appreciate it. We are heartbroken to have only had 62 hours with Webster, but will be always grateful for the opportunity to have known and helped him.

Many thanks and blessings to all of you who devote yourselves to caring for these beautiful animals.

"Early" has passed on ...

Well, we realize now that Webster's nickname "Early," was very appropriate, as he has left this earthly realm much too early. We cannot begin to express the huge loss we are feeling right now.

Early slept peacefully last night, right next to our palette on the floor. His breathing was good and we knew he was not feeling any pain thanks to the meds. He woke us around 3:30 a.m., vocalizing a little to us ... not whimpering, or stressful sounding in any way, but rather a few sounds of resignation. We debated about whether he needed to go outside, but he continued sleeping peacefully, so we let him. A while later, we heard a soft bark from him ... the first and only bark of any kind he'd made in his time with us. We know now he was telling us thanks and good-bye. We woke up around 7:00 a.m. to find him lifeless.

I'm struggling to even get this written ... there's a loss beyond words. Many of you have probably experienced this with your beloved pets who have passed on, so you know the feelings. I found myself sitting next to his poor, tired body, trying to warm him up and bring him back somehow ....

I spent sometime sitting outside trying to understand what we may have missed, what we could have done differently ... trying to understand how we failed to heal little "Early." A thought floated through my mind that sometimes it's not about healing but about helping.

Many of YOU have helped us and Early - a mountain of gratitude to all of you! Your donations, positive calls and emails and prayers of support were felt so deeply. On a positive note, the donations helped pay for his fluids and meds and these will still be put to good use. The vet's staff assured us they will use them for rescue dogs (Riverview Animal Hospital - they have been wonderful and caring). So, your gifts will keep on giving to other sweet Early's out there. Bless all of you and thank you so much for helping us.

Love, steph and mike
Webster's new permanent home on the web will be this blog, reachable at: http://www.websterstory.com

He's no longer with us

We just woke to find Webster peaceful, but not breathing. We don't know why he didn't stay, we miss him so... please now hold us in your thoughts and prayers, as we come to terms with his passing. There are lessons to be learned here but we are in too much shock to know what they will be... more later.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

First subcutaneous fluids administered at home...


Webster did not even have to wake up, much less go anywhere. We just hung the bag on the door that he was sleeping by and he barely noticed. It still hurt us to have to stick him (we both hate needles), but the peace of mind that comes from knowing that he is getting regular fluids outweighs the hurt. Webster is now wearing an Igor-sized hump on his shoulder that will, hopefully, keep him hydrated for the next 8 hours. We are hoping for good regenerative and healing sleep for him, and any sleep possible for us.

Back from Vet

We called the vet and they had us come right away, moving our 6:15pm appointment up to 3pm, we really did not think he would make it all the way to 6pm without getting some fluids into him and we just couldn't stand seeing him like he was. His breathing was getting labored and noisy, every breath with a grunt/groan of pain. We stayed out in parking lot and they gave us 3 days worth of fluids and meds and instructions on how to do the IV ourselves ... aaahhgggg.... We now have everything that we need to treat him ourselves with subcutaneous fluid therapy. I'm pretty sure that he is feeling better and I know that I am.